With my training instructor

Taken at PQUE parking lot

Home At Last!

I’m so excited. Few hours from now, I’ll be home with my son.

I woke up at 2AM to make sure that everything’s in order before I check out from the hotel. My brother accompanied me to the airport, to help me with my baggage.

Waiting in the airport lounge for my flight (boarding) to be announced, I entertained myself with photos of my son saved in my phone. Did he already forget about me? Will he remember my as his “mama”?

I marveled at how I managed to survive the lonely nights in Manila. Sure, I had bouts of depression every time I get to my hotel room with only the TV as my company. I had crying sessions every time I remember my son while I lay down in bed, waiting for sleep to carry me to Dreamland. Buckets of tears! I promised to myself that If I can help it, after this one, I would decline all out-of-base trainings. I am just not ready for another week-long separation, for now.

Fast forward. I heaved a sigh of relief upon opening our front door. When Nanay came out carrying Matt, I was beaming with joy. And I had a taste of heaven when I saw my darling son grinning upon seeing me.

Whirr!

It’s been 3 hours since I last held my son in my arms. And I already missed him- terribly, that is. I missed hearing his laughter and his baby talks, seeing his toothless grin and watching him scramble from one side of the bed to the opposite side.

The drone of the aircraft engine, as it navigates its route to Manila, was unable to muffle this longing.

I tried to relax in my seat but the thought of what my 10-day stay in Manila was making me more uneasy than the air pockets were causing.

For the nth time since my boss called up about a company training in Manila, I wondered whether my decision to accept the training is sound. How will I ever survive a 10-day training away from home? Time and time again, I’m having one of those unending debate with myself about my priorities-- of issues between my career and my family.

As the plane touched down the tarmac, I closed my eyes and silently prayed that Matt will be okay, with his health and all. That’s all I can do for now.